Step by step He leads me

November 4, 2010

Greetings from Wisconsin!

I have just recently returned home from Missouri as my grandma has been experiencing poor health of late. She was admitted into the hospital because she was dehydrated, had low blood pressure, as well as a couple different infections, one being a mild case of pneumonia. Grandma has been doing poorly for a while, suffering from Dimentia of late, as well as Glaucoma for many years. About a month ago when my mom was visiting, Grandma made a conscious decision for Christ. We are praying that she feels His love and presence near her during this time of a lot of confusion and pain in her body. Grandma will probably be staying in the hospital for a while so the doctors can run some tests. Please remember her in prayer, as well as her many children and their families.

Thank you all for praying, and for standing behind me in my decision-making. I have been learning so much about trusting God this year, and this is just one more step for me. I have made a decision this past week to not have chemotherapy treatment, but rather to pursue health by natural means, involving change in my diet, and herbal supplements to bring my body back to health. It was a big decision to make, and I struggled a lot to know which way was the best way for me. I believe I have chosen a path that is not very popular, and yet one I believe will be the best for the sake of my health.

I had an appointment with my Naturopath today, and she sees good progress in my health, though I still have to work at getting my body back to a stronger state because of the cancer. One of my greatest points I need to work on is sleep, as so much healing can occur while resting. I can sleep, but I need to get more sleep, by going to bed early.

Also, I want to express my gratitude for your prayer support for Michail during his long recovery period from his bed sores. He is still slowly but surely getting better, and has been able to begin to function a bit more normally this past week, as he has been able to spend even more time up in his wheel chair, and not in bed all the time. We both still covet your prayers for a total and complete recovery!

Again, I cannot say enough how thankful I am for you all. You have helped me to keep going during one of the hardest years of my life. Don't ever feel like you are not helping someone by praying for them. I can truly say that the peace that I have felt through my trial with cancer has been tremendous, and I know it is a result of you holding me up in prayer before the Lord, night and day.

This passage of scripture has been my testimony. God has allowed all that I have been facing to use it later in my life as a message to bring to others who may be experiencing the same suffering.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort. For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many.” 11 Corinthians 1:3-11

Thank you again for following me with these emails. I know I am apt to write a lot, so I appreciate those of you who take time to read these updates.

Blessings in the name of Yeshua,

Melanie

Blessed is he who believes when he cannot see

October 26, 2010

Greetings Dear Friends,

Thank you for remembering Michail and I in prayer. I have returned home to the United States, following a two week visit in Canada. I left Michail in a much improved condition, praise God!

Michail saw a wound care specialist doctor (Oct.18), and he received good news, just as I had specifically prayed. The doctor was able to debride(remove effected tissues) of one sore, and he gave Michail permission to spend 1-2 hours a day in his wheelchair! This was awesome news for both of us. I was so glad to see God answer prayer.

The difficulty is not yet over, as Michail's recovery time will still be about at least four weeks. His first time up in his chair was great! We went for a walk in the beautiful Autumn weather. It was so good to see Michail up and getting around again, though it was tiring for him after a short time. Can't you just see the delight on both of our faces?

We realized how grateful we are for his wheelchair, after him being in bed for three weeks. Isn't it amazing how often we take things in life for granted?

Please continue to pray for my sweetie, as he is still slowly healing.

Pray that the sores will recover in a way that he can soon be back to normal. The latest news is that Michail is being treated with a laser light for his bed sores, and seems to have been experiencing much improvement because of it! We are truly grateful for all those who have helped to make Michail more comfortable, and all the ideas and helpful hints that you have shared with us.

In spite of the discomfort and inconvenience of being in bed all day long, the time Michail has spent down has not been worthless. He said that the Lord has been teaching him so much about surrender to the sovereignty of God and having patience to wait on the Lord.

The Lord has taught us both so much spiritually through all these trials and challenges. He has given us the opportunity to get to know each other more. We have enjoyed many times of prayer together and with other believers, as they have rallied around Michail at this time period. It is wonderful to see how the body of Christ comes together when one member of the body is weak.

Many friends from his church, and Messianic Fellowship have been coming on a regular basis, many of them bringing gifts of fresh fruit, vegetables and healthy snacks for both of us to enjoy. They have been very considerate of my current diet restrictions, and Michail has been very good about supporting me by joining me in my healthy alkaline diet.

Other friends have come from out of town, traveling a long way to both visit Michail, and to get to know me. It has been a blessing to get to know many of Michail's friends that have been supporting me in prayer since I received news about my health condition. Some of them have even contributed financially to help cover my Canadian hospital expenses before they even met me in person! The body of Christ is amazing!

We have also shared many mealtimes with some of Michail's unsaved friends as we believe for their salvation.

I am continuing to believe God for his provision. There is still a large outstanding amount owing for the Canadian hospital bill, and I currently do not have any income. However, I have personally witnessed how the Lord has been providing, and continues to provide in answer to prayer. One of the ways God has miraculously provided for me was the approval from the state of Wisconsin for full medical coverage of the expenses for my surgery in August and the hospital stay that followed. Thank you Yahweh-Jireh – my Provider! His grace continues to amaze me every new day.

Thank you to all of you for your prayers, love, and letters of encouragement. You have blessed me beyond words. Please continue to believe with me for my total healing, and Michail's recovery from bedsores, and also his total healing from paralysis.

I thank my God upon every remembrance of you,

Melanie

Please pray for us!

Dear Friends,

I am writing with an urgent prayer request for my dear Michail. Three weeks ago, he develoved 2 bed sores, and has since then been confined to his bed, only able to lay on his right or left side, and sitting up is impossible.

He has been having some care, but, it seems, not the best, as the condition of the sore seems to just worsen.

Please pray for him, emotionally, as this is very tough on him. He has been learning a lot spiritually, as he has had so much time to be down. The Lord has been speaking to him about surrender and patience, but I know, personally, as I have been able to be with him for the past 2 weeks, that it is very hard on him. Already being limited to a wheelchair, it is extra tough to have to now be limited to his bed.

We would both appreciate your prayers, as this is very tough on me as well. I want to help him so much, and do all that I can, and I feel so helpless. I can't give him the help he needs, and yet I know it has been a blessing for both of us to have had this time to spend with eachother in spite of the circumstances. It is almost comical how we have run into this kind of situation so often since we have known each other. Either I am down and he is lifting me up, or he is weak, and I am trying to be encouraging to him.

Personally, I am doing well, in spite of getting over a cold that I have picked up in Canada, during my stay here. Otherwise, I am feeling great. I am recovering very well following my operation, and am currently following a very strict raw foods diet given by a Naturopath that I am seeing. I am still trusting the Lord to show me what steps to take to best care for my body. Right now I am honestly not thinking much about myself, since Michail is suffering so much. I hurt for him. I wish I could help to make it all better, but at this point I have to simply, and again, trust God. That is what I keep being brought back to. Why there has been so much of this in my life right now, only He knows. I want to accept what comes my way with understanding that He knows why.

I appreciate all your prayers. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

God bless you, dear ones,

Melanie

God is stronger

updates coming soon.

i appreciate your prayers and your patience.

my God is so strong-ya know that?

you know what else?

you have to be weak

to really be able to feel

His strength in your life...oh yeah.

Surgery

Tomorrow(Tuesday) morning I will be going into surgery at 7:30am to remove a football size mass on my left ovary. It is uncertain what type of tumor/cyst I have until after the operation when it is sent for testing.

I have been in a lot of pain the past few days, because I have had a change in my pain medication to prepare for the operation. The medication I am currently on has not helped with the pain as much.

The surgery is scheduled to last for about 2-3 hours, depending on what they find after testing the tumor after removal. If the tumor is found to be malignant, then they will have to go back in and do a biopsy of other things. We are praying that this is unnecessary, and that the surgery will remove the mass intact and leave nothing behind. It will be major surgery for this reason. They want to remove it in one piece. Following the surgery, I will have a few days to recover in the hospital before returning home to my family's house in Milwaukee.

I want to extend many thanks to all that have helped out with my brothers and sisters while my parents were in Canada, and all those who have unceasingly prayed for me. Thank you so much! The way you have expressed your love and devotion has touched my heart in ways that I could never have imagined!

Please continue to keep my family in your prayers. This has been a hard trial for them. They have been real troupers, but have been through so much already to try and do the best for me, and keep me comfortable.

We will definitely try to keep everyone updated, but please be patient with us if there is no response for a while. Phone calls will probably be the best way to get a hold of my family, if not on facebook.

Emotionally, I have been doing well, for the most part. At times, I have definitely struggled a lot. But God has really encouraged me to see that He has a bigger plan in mind. I am excited to see what testimony He is going to bring out of this! The Lord has been my strength. I would not be able to go on without Him.

Michail is currently on his way from Canada to be near me during my surgery and recovery. I am blessed to have such an awesome man in my life who loves me and cares about me before himself.

I love you! Hugs to you all.

melanie

He is my Defense. I shall not be moved!

Dear Friends,
I don't know how many of you have been following the details of my present condition on facebook, but here I will attempt to give a more detailed update.

I am still in Canada, and will be remaining here for a while I suspect, as the health procedures necessary for my condition are more affordable here than in the states, as I have no health coverage there, nor here, for that matter. Yet, even in this, there will still be a considerable amount of hospital bills, and in spite of my current low income situation, I know that somehow the Lord is going to provide all the finances needed.

God has graciously allowed me to be here with dear friends for this time- Michail's family-and I really believe God has His hand on this whole situation. The support I have been receiving has so encouraged me to keep on, and keep my eyes on my Father. I have been fearful, and have struggled a lot, but the Lord has been my help.

I returned to the hospital for an MRI following an ultrasound, which confirmed what the doctors suspected. I have a very large growth on my left ovary, the size of a football. Shocking, yes. I am not quite sure what to make of it, but God knows.

I saw a gynecologist the day after the MRI, and she confirmed that I needed surgery to have it removed as soon as possible. We are waiting for he hospital to call us back regarding the date of the surgery, as I have been placed on an emergency cancellation list. The doctor said that [unless God intervenes] I will definitely lose my left ovary, and they are not sure about the right ovary, as the size of the mass keeps them from being able to see very clearly before operating. We are praying the surgery can begin tomorrow.

For a woman, obviously this is a very serious thing, especially at my age, and being single. We are praying for a miracle, and even the preservation of the left ovary, should the Lord be so gracious.
Also, though this condition is not uncommon for a woman of my age, it is not very common for it to be this size. They will not know the type of tumor/cyst it is until they have removed it and can send it for testing. Of course it will be tested for cancer, etc.

My parents were able to get their passports expedited very quickly and make it to Canada, after quite a procedure, and many, many praying friends and family interceding on their behalf.

They drove to the passport office in Detroit, MI, and walked out with their passports in one hour! Praise the Lord. I am so glad they can be here to support me, and they are glad to be near me, of course, during this tough time.

Of course, because I do not know the outcome of this surgery, or what will follow, I am very unsure about the future in regards to my upcoming missions trip to Moldova.
As you can imagine, all of my attempt at beginning to raise support for my trip has been put on hold, as I have been in an intense amount of pain, have been in and out of the emergency room and hospital, and have been on pain medication round the clock-which only seems to take a small edge off the discomfort I am feeling.

Only God knows, of course. All I can say is, I can do no preparation ahead of time at this point. I am away from home, and may be for an extended period of time, depending on the results of my surgery.

Please freely tell anyone you can about me. I can use all the prayer I can get.
Thank you so much for all your prayer support and encouraging words. I will try to keep you updated as much as possible. If I am unable, I am sure my family will try to post news on facebook.
I am blessed beyond words because of all the awesome support I have been getting from home, in Canada, and around the world. The Body of Christ is so indescribable!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

the latest and the greatest from the homefront...

Hello everyone. It is really me. I am still alive! There is so much to share right now, that I am unsure of how to begin, but I know I must, or I will continue to leave you hanging longer.

About four weeks ago, I made a decision that changed things in my preparations for the mission field. I realized that after striving so hard to accomplish so many things all at once, that I had to give up. Give up? I can hear some of you saying, "No! Never give up! We don't quit, remember?". I well remember this from Moldova. My team and I were fighters, and were not willing to let anything stop the work that God intended to do in our lives to touch other lives.


Let me explain how I gave up. I was striving hard to juggle a bunch of things all at once, that I think God did not want me to bear alone. First, upon returning home from Moldova, I was immediately thrust into the busyness of life, and though I was given time to recuperate, the culture change was very drastic, and getting use to a fast pace world again, that for some reason was even faster than normal, after being accustomed to a laid back, slow moving culture, was not easy at all. but I had no choice. I was needed at my place of work. Shortly after returning home, I found out that my boss' wife needed to have major surgery. We were all glad that the surgery did not have to take place until to a later date, so I had some time to get accustomed to the campground routine again, and somewhat gain footing for what was coming, as well as give her time to prepare herself.
The surgery was successful on June 18th.


Since her surgery, my boss' wife has been on medical leave for the past 4 weeks, unable to assist me in the office. It the middle of this recovery we were hit with a big holiday weekend, July 4. By the grace of God we made it through that weekend, considering the multitude of issues that surfaced with campers. Along with this, I began to not feel well, which, after seeing a doctor, resulted in a stomach problem because I had been stressing myself too much. It was not just work alone was causing stress in my life, but other very important decisions I have been faced with, which is to follow in detail.

All this time, I have also been balancing another very important decision in life, which you know about if you have been following this blog. I have been preparing to return to Moldova for 2 years. When I returned from Moldova in April of this year, I was willing to take up the challenge to get ready to return there in 4 short months. I was ready to trust God to provide for a trip in a small window of time, because I knew He was able to come through for me. I still believe in His ability to do that. But, I believe He also spoke to me that I needed to be wise in my preparations as well. I was allowing the stress of too many things to take its toll on my physical body, which was not a good start to preparing for overseas travel.
So, after prayer, and counsel with leadership in the organization I am affiliated with, I made a decision to postpone my August trip to January. This will give me more time to raise support, and spend time with my family, and overall, just time to settle things here in a timely manner before leaving.


As I posted a couple entries ago, I have been accepted for this trip, so I can begin to receive support for my trip. There is a lot involved, but I know that as God has called me, He will equip me. Pretty soon I will post more concrete details regarding my trip, and if anyone is interested in receiving a prayer letter from me, with more details, please send me your home address one of several ways:

>Email : mella_phillips@yahoo.com
>Facebook: melanie phillips
>this blog: mellasmessages.blogspot.com
>Snail mail: N5146 North Rd/Burlington, WI/53105 USA


And, last but ccertainly not least, I have to mention with a smile, something else very new and exciting that is going on in my life of late. In the midst of the hubbub of the above mentioned things going on in my life, a certain special Russian man slipped into my life, and has found a place in my heart. It is a unique story we share, and in spite of how technology can really stink at times, I am so blessed by the way that God has used it in my life for the past 2 months to unite me with such a wonderful man of God.
Michail Bantseev came into my life somewhat unexpectedly this spring. I have been corresponding with the Bantseev family in Siberia for 5 years, since I had showed interest at one point in going to Siberia for ministry with his brother's family. Though not completely unknown to me, all these years, Michail was the one helping them out by sending prayer letters and updates out to friends and family. I was a recipient of those mailings. I also became a part of his ministry(quadonamission.com) mailing list at some point over those years. In spite of the fact that we had some sort of connection, our paths never crossed, personally, until this May, when we became friends on Facebook, and shortly after, on Skype. Our relationship has taken wings! It's awesome to see what God has been doing, and how we have been living almost side by side in two different countries, complete strangers, but destined for something much bigger, when God saw fit to bring us together.
Michail is originally from Siberia, but has lived most of his life in Canada, where his family immigrated from Siberia about 22 years ago.
About a week ago, Michail made the long journey from London, ON to come to Wisconsin to meet me-our first face to face encounter, aside from over Skype! It was awesome! God answered a lot of his questions, and calmed a lot of fears in both of our hearts. We have made a decision in our hearts that we are going to follow what God is doing in our relationship. We are now "seeing each other" also known as courting -as much as you can between Canada and Wisconsin - with serious intentions. :) We are so blessed by the Lord's hand in our lives, and are excited about the future.

What does this mean in regards to my trip to Moldova, you may ask? Well, if you recall in past blog posts, I have mentioned struggles with knowing if I am to return to Moldova. This was the root issue. I have since then stepped out in faith, and chosen to trust God, and follow him to Moldova. But Michail is over here! Yes, he is, and it will be a challenge to be so far away, but there is nothing too hard for God. Will it put our relationship to the test? Absolutely. Is God big enough to handle that for us? Definitely. My Savior-He can move the mountains. He can make possible what seems IM-possible. He is God. There is no other like Him. I call His name Jesus. He is all that I need. He is more than enough for me. He will sustain me, us. He will uphold us, and keep us. There is nothing like the test of time to set in stone the plan of God!

I greatly covet your prayers right now. I am experiencing a lot of testing and proving, and I am attempting to learn what it all means to get ready to leave my own country for a long time. It is hard, to be blatantly honest. Part of me doesn't want to go. But, I know that God has called me. I know He will lead me and direct me, and even renew the passion I once had. Please stand behind me. I need strong arms to support me, and keep me going. I would love to hear from those that are willing to hold me up in prayer. We all need a bit of encouragement sometimes.
Thank you for how you have allowed Christ to minister to me through your life. I look forward to hearing from you!